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Showing posts from October, 2016

Women are not and were not made to be slaves!

It is not a woman's place to keep a man!

Unfortunately, this is not the most popular sentiment in a generation obsessed with submission(read en-slaving) women. Women have been conditioned into believing that their lives are lived for men. Men also have been conditioned into believing the same. So we have a whole generation of young underachievers whose greatest achievement is to 'serve a man' and 'be served by a women' in the name of submission.

We have a whole generation of women who have planned for nothing except the 'opportunity' to 'belong' to a man. Women who will give up their hopes and dreams and settle for helping a man achieve his because they have been conditioned to do so. And of course men who have gotten with the program. A lot of men feel entitled to female submission. They believe it is their place to dominate these beings who probably have no dreams of their own and even if they do, they are not all that important!

Don't get me …

'Expectation Adjustments'

Have you ever been so psyched up about a particular prospect that you put all your energies in attempting to pursue it? Well, I suppose we've all been there one way or the other- pumped to the brim with adrenaline from the possibility of something working out for us in a way we hope it will.

I suppose that's a good place to be; to have some sort of purpose or end you're working towards and are focused on. I know I really appreciate focus- I'm a strong believer in purpose and it's accomplishment.

So may I ask, what happens when despite your psych, you realise that you never had what it took to actually make the cut for this thing you were pursuing? What then? Do you curl up in a ball? Do you curse the world? Do you shake it off and move on to the next prospect? What do you do?

Of course all the above are possible options and so much more: some I have not thought of. Generally speaking though, it would be a question of dealing with disappointment! How does one deal w…

Mentorship is a hoax!

I have had a number of experiences with potential mentors and have almost reached the conclusion that it's all a very big hoax! There is no such thing as legitimate mentorship. Everyone seems to be out for what they can get from who; the mentor from the mentee and vice varsa.

I have met people who in the name of mentoring will make you build their empire for them and then turn around and step on your head like you did not matter in the first place. It's a very puzzling place for anyone to find themselves because when you look up to someone, you more often than not put them on a pedestal. They are untouchable because of the kind of respect you accord them. Many times you'll even defend them in front of people who believe otherwise.

So for that person who you respect beyond anything to disrespect you and bring your world crushing down is a harsh thing. It changes you in ways you did not know were possible. It toys with your belief in the goodness of people. Many times, it ha…

We are powerless over our emotions!

I have heard people say we are powerless over our emotions.

This does not resound with me. I admit there are so many things I feel very strongly about- i.e my convictions. However, despite how strong the emotions attached to whatever conviction, I have learnt to draw a line on what works and what doesn't.

I don't have some sort of solution to make you not feel the things you feel. I'm just saying that, emotions, however powerful should not dictate your response to life. Why? Because they change. Yes, very often, they change and what spurred certain emotions in you the first time will not necessarily do so the next time!

I have made some major decisions in a bout of anger or excitement and have had to swallow my words so painfully after the moment has passed. When I was younger, I was too proud to remedy relationships that were affected by my emotional meltdowns because I was convinced I didn't need those people anyway! But also, I was too ashamed to take back what I ha…

Is culture that big a deal?

It's amazing that being curious about culture raises some major concerns in our day and age! People begin to wonder what's not happening with you when you curl up into the ball of cultural discovery. I mean outward concern; so much that the general perception is that you're considering your future mate and decided to read up on what to expect.

I recently started reading a book on Acholi culture- seeing as I'm Acholi and you'll be shocked how much dust it seems to be raising. I mean even from my tribe mates... A lot of what should be cultural pride has dwindled with our generation into cultural shame. We are so ashamed of our roots that we'd rather pretend not to know where we're from than be identified as a particular societal segment!

I know so many young people who purportedly cannot speak their 'language' and fall back on that shady 'American accent' to try and be cool. I must ask though, what cool is and who decided that those particular…

I don't care... But do I?

Do we all secretly care what people think and probably say about us? I wonder...

You must be wondering why the random question? Sometimes I have these conversations with people that really stimulate my mind and when my mind starts, it just goes! I mean literally. I start to think and try to get actual answers to these questions- that's if they really are any.

I am still of the school of thought that all things- except God are relative and therefore are subject to change. So even our thought patterns may not necessarily be the same tomorrow as they are today. But that's a little of track. Back to the above question.

Do we sometimes convince ourselves that we don't care what people think and then secretly go wonder what they think about the fact that we don't care what they think? It probably does happen, yeah? We may want to convince ourselves that we don't care but we probably do- even just a little bit.

Of course the extent to which we pay attention to what people…