Saturday, October 24, 2015

The Fight Within


My flesh, oh my flesh! Why dost thou plague me!
There are days that my flesh goes on rampage and I mean RAMPAGE!!! On those days my flesh is convinced that it knows what’s best for me and overrides my mind. When the things my body feels flood my mind, it takes it upon itself to derive possible ways that my flesh can be satisfied.
For the record, I am saved.
The voices in my head push me to a place of indulgence and try as I may, I cannot seem to overcome this. Paul is so accurate when he says we are tempted by our own evil desires. A lot of that temptation comes from a secret place in my mind where a lot of evil desires are stashed. Desires that I cannot even admit to myself.
I have started to realise that all the times I have fallen, it’s been because I feel like superwoman.
“I’m too big for my body too control me. Temptation is for the weak!”
(Insert laughing emoji). I am not strong! I am so weak and frail! I do not have the strength to overcome any temptation! The more I try in my own strength, the harder I fall.
On days like this, I have discovered, there is someone greater, stronger and willing to help me. I just need to ask and surrender it to Him.
The one day that I asked the Spirit of God to help me, I knew I had struck gold! I did not know how to but by the grace of God, I relinquished all control or the illusion of it to Him and man, He helped me. He held my hand and walked me through it.
He reminded me how His strength is made perfect in my weakness. How He will never leave me nor forsake me. He reminded me of how rewarding it is to trust and walk with Jesus one day at a time. To have a high Priest who understands my struggles and intercedes for me. I’m telling you, it is a beautiful thing to know that God is looking out for you, all you need to do is learn to trust and be surrendered to Him.
Does my flesh still plague me despite this revelation, yes! But now, I don’t have to fight on my own. My dear friend helps me though it!

Thursday, October 22, 2015

About Guardian Angels

This post is about a very special someone who has proved on more than one occasion to be a shoulder I can lean on with no judgement.
Life has a way of causing our paths to cross with some of the most amazing and definitely also fake people. Today I write about someone who keeps teaching me, without even trying, the value of a friend. I won’t be so bold as to call him my best-friend so I’ll stick with guardian angel.
I don’t know if you’ve ever had seasons where you don’t seem to understand yourself and you hardly would blame people for steering clear of you. Sometimes you even make it easier and stay away from them so they won’t have to feel obligated to carry your burden.
Yeah. I know. That’s some very deep emotional ish. I have had seasons like that.
See I’m not a crier and I’m not a person who looks for sympathy either. I have taught myself over the years to look out for me and deal with myself without necessarily drawing anyone in. So, one day a few years back, I met this gorgeous man. My intention was to learn about a particular field of interest from him and yes, I did learn and I still am learning about it.
What beat me though, was how I comfortable I was around him. I’ve had more than one season where he has allowed to hold my hand. Seasons that under normal circumstances would drive one to the point of insanity. Today, it hit me hard. He has no obligation whatsoever to me. Nothing ties him to me. Yet he has stayed and been kind, helpful, thoughtful and caring.
Of course I have not done a single thing to deserve that. So today I celebrate my very own guardian angel. I won’t mention his name cuz I’m selfish like that but when you do read this my dear guardian angel, know this:
I appreciate you. I applaud your kindness. I know I can never repay you but I pray that this token will be somewhat of a thank you. I dig you and I am so very glad that God caused our paths to cross. I drink to your health, wealth, success- if you may and to many more blessings for you!!!

Tuesday, October 20, 2015

I am a FEMINIST!!!

“What is your obsession with women? It’s like every conversation with you involves women empowerment or something women-related. Breathe madam, breathe!”

I couldn’t help but laugh at how accurate a description of me this was. I just did not agree with the way he made it sound so insufferable.

I am very passionate about women and helping them discover who they are (definitely within the confines of God’s word). I believe that a woman who knows what she’s about is an invaluable treasure to humanity and can literally hold the world together. I believe women must know who they are to be able to grasp such a thing as a beautiful world.

Don’t get it twisted. I am no man-hater. Heck, majority of my friends are men. I am that kind of ‘feminist’ who believes that the world needs both men and women. Yes, that feminist who believes that women only need to discover and be comfortable with who they are to co-exist with men. I don’t believe in the battle of the sexes, that’s a fallacy. Selfishness if you may. Who are we trying to prove what to?

Woman was never meant to compete with man and vise versa but rather to work together and have dominion. Our gender greed has subdivided what would be dynamite into the insecure egotistic male and the insecure over controlling female. For both these extremes, middle ground can never be found as one will always blame the other for what’s not right in society.

I don’t believe there are sides just roles and responsibilities.

Being a woman is a very powerful thing that a lot of people have belittled consequently causing the divide in our world. I am confidently proud in my femininity but I need men. Men to work with. Men to talk to. Men to love. Men to mentor my future sons and daughters. Even men to love me- more like one man though. I’m not polyandrous!

However, men must take responsibility for who they are. That’s the only way this kind of feminism works. A woman confident in who she is needs a man who knows what he’s about or else we’ll have another case of the bossy woman and the cowardly man. Or pity love (where one feels obligated to love the other out of pity). Now that, would totally suck!

So I do love women enough not to let them believe the lie of existence without men nor the stereotype that all men are dogs. I am passionate to see a world where women grow and mentor other women to be confident in who they are, know what they deserve and not settle for anything less than that. Where there is injustice I believe justice must be pursued not abused. So, I toast to a world of co-existance!

Monday, October 19, 2015

Dream on!!!


I think the reward for conformity is that everyone likes you except yourself – Rita Mae Brown
Too many times I have not been content with who I am physically, emotionally and mentally. I have allowed people to make me feel less than I am because of who they thought I should have been at that moment. I have let myself believe that I need to fit in- conform to the statusquo and I can assure you that’s an extremely miserable place to be. Despite similarities in culture, temperaments, character, upbringing and education, each of us are uniquely different. God did not create many copies of the same thing.
Many times we question our ability to do things and listen to negativity so much that we drop our dreams altogether. Negativity should never be the reason you give up your dream.
Don’t get me wrong, criticism is very important but never allow anyone’s opinion of your dream to be the reason why you quit. In that moment of course that negativity is hurtful but don’t make any life altering decisions in the heat of the moment. Cool down and analyse what was said, take what you need and discard what you don’t. That means if the negatives hold water, don't discard them. Swallow that bitter pill, it will help you.
No one said pursuing your dream would be easy. On the contrary, it will be hard and some days will be worse than others but you have to remember what comes easy, usually goes easy. What you toil for, you value highly. So no matter how hard it gets, you’ve got to hang in there and keep at it. Keep your eyes on the prize: where you’re going Vs where you are.
Is it scary? Very much so but it really is up to you whether you stay paralysed because of fear or rise above it. And the latter is always better. Acknowledge that whatever dream you have; God has equipped you to accomplish it. Only have faith and follow His lead.
So don’t go conforming to the standard set by your peers. Stand out and surpass their standard. Don’t look down upon yourself because of your physical or financial limitations but pursue that dream knowing that your diligence will open the necessary doors for you.
Every time you’re knocked down, get right back up. Don’t sulk about how many times you fall. Simply rise up again. No pity parties my dear. Find people who understand your journey because you will need them to support you. Find mentors to hold your hand and cheer you on. People who will tell you the hard truths without being too afraid.
Hold on to that dream! Pursue it and do not give up!